Movie Review: The Legend of Hercules

The Legend of Hercules was by far the funniest of the films chosen for your Historically Inaccurate Movie Day. Unintentionally so. We found ourselves in hysterics largely due to our inability to hear the dialogue as a number of the cast had very strong accents. As a result we decided to fill in our own dialogue.

As the title says, this is the genesis story of the demi-god Hercules.

Running time: 99 minutes

Director: Renny Harlin

Starring: Kellan Lutz, Gaia Weiss, Scott Adkins

Inaccuracies vs. The Mythology

Amphitryon purposefully killing the King of Tiryns vs. accidentally killing Aclmene‘s father and seeking purification
Amphitryon’s rejection of Hercules and the murder of Alcmene vs. raising Hercules with the best tutors (many of which were gods) and having a wife that honoured him like no other
Alcmene turning to the goddess Hera for help vs. Hera hating Zeus’ countless affairs and punishing Hercules by trying to kill him
Iphicles’ (Hercules’ half-brother) jealousy vs. the brother who died in battle and whose own son became Hercules’ charioteer
The killing of the Nimean Lion as a chance encounter vs. The Twelve Labours of Hercules as an amends for killing his wife (Megara) and children from a temporary madness caused by Hera
The source of Hercules’ strength is that he is the son of Zeus vs. Hera’s being tricked into nursing the infant Hercules and her divine milk giving him his power
Hercules being outcast by his father and sold into slavery by his brother (for gladiatorial games) vs. being raised lovingly be Amphitryon and eventually sold into slavery (not gladiatorial games) by Apollo for the murder of Iphitus at Tiryns

Hercules’ lover Hebe betrothed to his brother vs. Hebe being Hercules’ sister and no arrangement of her marriage to Iphicles exists
Alcmene calling Hercules Alcides to hide his true name from Amphitryon vs. his parents dropping the epithet Alcides from his name, to unsuccessfully appease Hera
Being the origin story of a Greek hero named Hercules vs. his Greek name Herakles
Roman and Egyptian weapons, armour and formations vs. I shouldn’t have to explain why this is incorrect
Hercules chained in the Agora vs. this was actually Samson from the bible
Hercules’ lightning whip vs. his usual club, bow and arrows

Thoughts

Everything about this movie was bad. The heavy accents and thin dialogue, the special effects and terrible acting. The mythology was changed for no tangible betterment of the film. If we had not been half delirious from our sugar rush, I’m not sure we would have been able to finish this monstrosity. I have no idea why Hercules was made into a gladiatorial fighter, other than the filmmakers wanting to show off their 3D filming techniques. The only thing that was correct for the time period was the statues of Hera.

My rating: 1/5

Buy or rent The Legend of Hercules on Amazon.