“What are you going to do to me?” Lilly questioned, feeling nervous but incredibly aroused by Jake’s marauding fingers and powerful body pressing against hers. “Anything I want to.” His voice was hot and sultry.
– Riding with the Cop (Locations 116-118)
Lilly Thompson needs to complete her shadowing and is so close to her ride along time with Sergeant Jake Simmons being done. On the verge of completing her third, and final, shift, she makes a stupid but critical error. She begs, pleads and is willing to do anything to correct the mistake. Office Simmons seems to have a few ideas in mind, some that Lilly might not be so willing to participate in.
There is a very easy flow to the writing, making this story easy and fast to read. I didn’t find any glaring errors with the technical side of the writing so I have nothing to report here. This story is written in the third person, which adds to the easy narrative. Many of these sorts of short tryst novellas rely on a first person perspective and often, I find the story is left lacking. First person can be very difficult to write and more often than not, comes across as entirely disingenuous. So, the third person option was the right call here.
‘“Yes. Yes, I’ll ride with you as much as you want to make you see I can do things right,” Lilly replied nervously. “What if I want to do a special ride?” he questioned in a low, menacing voice.’ (Locations 95-97)
‘“You’re under arrest,” he breathed lightly in her ear. “You have no rights and you can scream all you want to when you come. No need to be silent.”’ (Locations 148-149)
‘Jake stalked towards her naked and Lilly sighed. Would she ever get tired of admiring that view?’ (Locations 269-270)
This story has a number of tropes which really irritate me in romance/erotica literature. Things like the verbose alpha male who needs constant validation that what he is doing and going to do is going to rock her world and ruin her for any other man after him; cheesy one-liners (like the second excerpt above); half-assed lip-service to fetishes (dubcon); ramming cocks into vaginas in one swift thrust, to name but a few. Thankfully, this story doesn’t have the most annoying trope of all – instalove. It does, however, use misplaced language. Consider that this is the first and only time that Lilly has seen Jake naked, yet when he walks away and she sees his gloriously naked backside, she wonders if would “ever” tire of admiring that view, as if she’s been seeing it for years and is still awed by it everyday. Using the wrong descriptive language for a situation is a surefire way to break immersion for the reader.
That said, I didn’t hate this story. As short, smutty pieces of writing go, this one wasn’t half bad. I would have preferred that the dubcon be slightly more hardcore or left out entirely, as it’s current iteration is just not believable. Jake spoke far too much. The “Alpha Male” is meant to be steadfast in his virility, confident in his manhood and sure of sexuality when dealing with the “fairer” sex. This guy was described well, physically, but the psyche of the character was a little soft. It was as if he needed constant affirmation. Not to be confused with consent. He needed to know that he was wanted, almost as if he couldn’t read the signs of her attraction.
The sexual content was pretty good but the idea of someone thrusting anything into a vagina in one swift movement is a little off-putting. I don’t mean in the middle of the act, when you’ve found your rhythm, I’m talking about that very first insertion. Ladies, tell me if I’m wrong but even after foreplay and prep work, can any of you just have a giant, unlubricated cock stuffed up your vag, in its entirety and all in one motion? I know I can’t. You gotta ease that bad boy in. And if you can, inbox me some tips honey. Don’t get me wrong, I totally get that this is fantasy and whimsy but the sex has to be kinda realistic when the rest of the scenarios in the story are.
If you are just trying your hand at dubcon literature, or your not sure how you feel about it, give this a read. It’s soft enough that you’ll be able to figure out which side of the line you’re on. Similarly, for women (and men) who like the talkative alpha, you should enjoy this story.
My rating: 3/5
You can buy Riding with the Cop on Amazon.
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The Billionaire’s Obsession (Boxset) – More from this author
Taken by the Minotaur – Supernatural dubcon
Throttle Me – Alpha Male Badboy