“Reaching out, I touch the glass, wishing it was her cheek. How soft and sweet would she be under my fingers? Would she be warm, like a favorite blanket, ready to wrap around me? Would she lean into my palm, begging for my strength? God, how I would give it to her. Nothing on this earth would be out of her reach if only she were mine.”
– Paying Daddy’s Debt (Locations 104-106)
From Amazon: When Ash Carpenter imagines a schoolgirl, the image doesn’t match her. She wears long skirts that are sort of frumpy. Her bulky sweaters hide her shape, and her hair is always in a messy bun. Her tennis shoes are clunky and worn, and there are runs in her thick tights. Her dark-framed glasses hide some of her face…but not all of it. Because he’s caught sight of those ice-blue eyes, and they’ve pierced him to his core.
She walks by his office every day, and finally he’s had enough. Ash decides he’s tired of waiting and it’s time to collect what he’s owed. She’ll come with him, because there’s no other choice. She’ll pay her daddy’s debt any way Ash sees fit.
Warning: Oh, honey, this is about to get filthy. If your delicate sensibilities can’t handle the dirty, then step aside for those of us who can. It’s quick, but it’s just the right length, if you know what I mean. *slow wink, elbow nudge, goofy snort*
The technical skill of the author is apparent. There are very few errors overall and the flow of reading is smooth. Though I’m not usually a fan of the first person, duel perspective technique (one chapter is from Ash’s persective and the next is from Jasmine’s), it worked very well for the narrative. There are a number of inconsistencies in the story, however. This is especially true of the Amazon description and what is in the actual text. The blurb clearly states our female protagonist’s eyes are ice-blue, when in fact:
“Her dark brown eyes are so big up close.” (Locations 113-114)
This story is only about 60 pages long and is meant to feed the younger (barely legal) woman/older man (not quite a Daddy) fantasy. I expected dirty, filthy sex. Not a stretch of the imagination when the juvenile warning in the blurb told me that that’s what would be in the story. Alas, I was deceived. The sex was mediocre and vanilla. Not even vaguely dirty. They didn’t even talk dirty…
“She bites her lip and looks deep into my eyes as she slides down onto my length. Her hymen stops her momentarily before I break through and she seats herself fully on my length.” (Locations 412-413)
The closest it ever really gets to dirty is this:
“I’m not going to let you shower before you leave today. I want to know that your virgin blood and my cum is smeared all over you, letting people know I got there already. You’ll do that for me, won’t you, sweetheart?” (Locations 425-427)
However, this isn’t overly unusual for any sort of “Alpha male” type story where the man feels the primitive need to mark “his woman”, and all that jazz and jizz. The virgin blood was a nice touch but not enough to make me fan myself.
This is really just a damsel in distress fantasy. The entire story is about a girl who has a crappy home life with a low-life father, and a smitten billionaire with more money than sense, who feels the need to flex those fiscal muscles, even when he doesn’t have to. It’s sappy and predictable, with a misleading title. Jasmine doesn’t have to pay off her father’s debt but rather her father’s debt is written off and Jasmine is given the choice to leave with Ash.
Once they leave together, it’s entirely a story of sweet promises, feeling safe and at home, and gentle and considerate love-making with multiple orgasms for her first time. If that’s what you’re looking for, go right ahead. If you were looking for something taboo, and a dirty, don’t spend the $1.13 on this, it’s the literary equivalent of “click bait”.
For some dirty, hostile, kidnapping fantasies, try Mr X. If you’re more into the older man/younger woman thing, give Broken Justice a go, and if you are looking for a tender love story with broken protagonists then Promise Me is the read for you. All contain alpha males and are full length novels.They’re pricier than this meager offering but well worth the read.
My rating: 2/5
Buy Paying Daddy’s Debts on Amazon.
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